Well, I’m sure that most of the moms agree with this topic. Kids and tantrums go hand in hand. I so want to write on this because I am going through a phase where both my girls follow this! And it’s irritating at times!
We all love cuddling kids, they are little angels. But there is sometimes where these little angles turn into little devils when they throw tantrums. These are kid’s behavior which would affect their mental state and sometimes that mood would continue all day long (sometimes)
Well, we know, this phase is easier to tell rather than to do! When a kid throws tantrums, just be calm and try to explain why they can’t get what they want. Of course, they won’t listen to you, though. But calmly telling them with a low/normal tone would not make them more irritated.
Stop Yelling Back:
This too comes under Patient Parenting. I would like to stress upon this as I was someone who yelled back at my kids when they threw tantrums. They cry, I yell and it made the situation even worst. Stop yelling or getting into arguments! Kids learn to back answer when ‘we back answer to them when they are in an irritating mood.’ This might sound funny, but it’s a fact!
The only way out! Kids throw tantrums because they want something from you and you have said a no! They cry, try to mess things around the home only to get your attention (you try to stop them and they do even more.) When they realize that this is not working they would divert themselves into something else.
This works for my kids. I try to laugh hard while making some funny faces or voices. And they sometimes give in! Because it’s hard to control laughter while someone else is laughing so hard and eventually end up laughing. A trick that I try to use rarely and so work for me.
Give them time:
Just let them be! When they have a meltdown, let them deal with it alone. But make sure kids won’t hurt themselves, others nor engage in something that hurts him. So that they learn to deal with it and after some time, they regain their self-control.
Have a very soft tone:
Now, this is something that I still need to practice! I try to avoid talking to my daughters while they are in a meltdown phase. But there are few times, where I try to answer them (that I usually end up raising my voice and talking in a way that I did not want to)—they cry a little more because I yelled at them. Try talking to them in a very soft tone. The higher they cry, the lower your voice should be!
Kids cannot state why they have Tantrums:
Children cannot reason their Tantrums! They can hardly understand the consequences of it. So we cannot expect a 3year or a 4year to behave properly nor have a reason for their tantrums!
Check for the Trigger points:
Kid’s Tantrums surface out of nowhere! There is always something that makes them anxious or triggers them and so they let it out in the form of a tantrum or have a meltdown! If we can check and have a talk about it to them, it might work. (For me, its chocolates, Phones, Ice-cream)
Kids have a very less concentration span! Make use of it. When you know your kid is about to throw a tantrum because you have said a No to them, make yourself ready to divert. A toy that they love, some artwork that they love to do, in the kitchen where they like to play with spoons and bowls, or just go for a little walk. Anything! That works for you! And Yes, sometimes kids won’t listen WhatSoEver! Keeping it real.
This leads us to the last point,
Whenever they throw a tantrum, they expect that you surrender, and IF you do things would be difficult in the future. They would know the trick that if they cry, they would get whatever they want! I am sure that most of the parents agree with this!
My kids throw tantrums for Chocolates, Ice cream, and Phones. Sometimes I give them, but it’s just a NO! And when I say no, they start! Yes, it is difficult to handle them while they cry but you know what is best for them and you gotta do even if they cry!
Patient Parenting is something I practice and let me tell you, I sometimes lose my cool (it is fine, we are learning too.) Stop Yelling Back, you yelling back is giving your child an idea to give back answers to you! And this brings us to Ignore when we ignore their tantrums they would know that this trick won’t work they would keep quiet. Laugh, when you start laughing in front of your kid for no reason they would eventually laugh too. If they don’t want to come to you then Give Them Time! The more you talk loud, the more they would disobey so Keep your Tone Low. Because they are kids and Cannot state a reason for their Tantrums. But we should always check for Trigger points that led to the start of this. Kids Divert so easily. So we could be ready with something that might interest them.
Note: All these points’ works for me (Sometimes) they are kids and they want to do what they want to do, anyway! And sometimes they just don’t listen. We cannot expect All Good behavior from them. They would hardly have any idea about it. I am sure that we were as crazy as our kids (fun fact)
Kids are kids! They cry, they throw tantrums, they throw things, they say a no when you tell something, they are naughty, they are mischievous, and they fight with siblings and get along with them in minutes. Every day is a new surprise for us. They learn and we learn. They growTweet